Funny Jokes and Dirty Jokes
Posted on 04.26.06 1:16AM under Sex Jokes
Pissfunny Joke for you all, hope you enjoy the Piss Funny Joke :
Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of their local golf course when a chap carrying a golf bag called out to them, “Do you mind if I join you? My partner didn’t turn up.”
“Sure,” they said, “You’re welcome.” So they started playing and enjoyed the game and the company of the newcomer.
Part way around the course, one of the friends asked the newcomer, “What do you do for a living?”
“I’m a hit man,” was the reply.
“You’re joking!” was the response.
“No, I’m not,” he said, reaching into his golf bag, and pulling out a beautiful Martini sniper’s rifle with a large telescopic sight. “Here are my tools.”
“That’s a beautiful telescopic sight,” said the other friend, “Can I take a look?…”
“I think I might be able to see my house from here.” So he picked up the rifle and looked through the sight in the direction of his house.
“Yeah, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic. I can see right in the window. Wow, I can see my wife in the bedroom. Ha Ha, I can see she’s naked!
What’s that? Wait a minute, that’s my neighbor in there with her. He’s naked as well! The bitch!” He turned to the hit man, “How much do you charge for a hit?”
“I do a flat rate, for you, one thousand dollars every time I pull the trigger.”
“Can you do two for me now?”
“Sure, what do you want?”
“First, shoot my wife, she’s always been mouthy, so shoot her in the mouth. Then the neighbor, he’s a mate of mine, a bit of a lad, so just shoot his dick off to teach him a lesson.”
The hit man took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly still for a few minutes. “Are you going to do it or not?” said the friend impatiently.
“Just wait a moment, be patient,” said the hit man calmly, “I think I can save you a thousand dollars here…..”
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Posted by Bryce on 05.06.06 8:05 pm
PUT THE REST OF THE JOKES!
Posted by mike on 05.16.06 4:48 pm
cmon wheres the reat of the joke we’re not kids
Posted by Anne on 06.03.06 2:23 pm
that is the whole joke idiots. If he only has to shoot once to shoothte wife in the mouth and to shot the neighbors penis off then what must the neighbor and the wife be doing?
Posted by WildShadow on 06.06.06 11:04 pm
She sucks the neighbor’s dick and the hit man shoots so it hit both targets.
Was it realy that hard to figure out?
Posted by rachel on 06.10.06 5:39 pm
were’s the rest of the joke???!!!???
Posted by Jacko on 07.12.06 9:44 am
theres no other part of the joke fools it leaves it to you to figure it >_
Posted by kat on 07.18.06 7:42 pm
some peole are stuppid
the jokes is that you should know what the out come is
it shouldent have to say … so the neighbour got a blow job and a sniper shot the wife in the mouth and the guy in the dick at the same time
duh
Posted by Fuck Off on 06.19.07 12:59 am
screw all of u guys i thought it was funny
and whoever didnt get it is a dumbass!
Posted by Fuck Off on 06.19.07 1:00 am
although it really wasnt a piss funny joke