Duckshit
Funny Jokes and Dirty Jokes
Irish Wedding
Posted on 10.26.05 7:36PM under Irish Jokes
A wedding occurred just outside Cavan in Ireland.
To keep tradition going, everyone gets extremely drunk and the bride’s and groom’s families have a storming row and begin wrecking the reception room and generally kicking the shit out of each other. The police get called in to break up the fight.
The following week, all members of both families appear in court. The fight continues in the courtroom until the judge finally brings calm with the use of his gavel, shouting, ‘Silence in court!’
The courtroom goes silent and Paddy, the best man, stands up and says,
‘Judge, I was the best man at the wedding and I think I should explain what happened.’
The judge agrees and asks Paddy to take the stand. Paddy begins his explanation by telling the court that it is traditional in a Cavan wedding that the best man gets the first dance with the bride.
The judge says, ‘OK.’
‘Well,’ said Paddy, ‘after I had finished the first dance, the music kept going, so I continued dancing to the second song, and after that the music kept going and I was dancing to the third song, when all of a sudden the groom leapt over the table, ran towards us and gave the bride an unmerciful kick right between her legs.’
Shocked, the judge instantly responded, ‘God, that must have hurt!’
‘Hurt?’ Paddy replies. ‘He broke three of my fingers!’
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Posted by haashley on 11.18.05 2:50 pm
irish people are not perverts like yall that wrote the joke. i take these jokes affencive!!
Posted by Josh on 11.30.05 5:46 pm
Ouch…ouuuuuccccchhhhhhh
Posted by seán on 12.17.05 7:54 am
hey dat sounds so familiar o ya it happened wit you mother.and only pikeys start fights at wedding they scum just like england,america and elves
Posted by kaurie on 12.31.05 6:36 am
haha that ashley person spellled offesively wrong…ha i hope shes not irish cuz that would make them dumb as well, i love this joke and cant wait to tell my mick friends…they will totally laugh
Posted by furi kuri on 01.29.06 6:25 pm
that happened to me once
Posted by Fetus on 02.26.06 1:08 pm
Ha ha, wow. You people really Suck at spelling. Anyway, I found the joke funny, and seeing as how I’m Irish, shut the fuck up “haashley”
Posted by EEVEE on 03.16.06 2:29 am
that was sooo funny
Posted by damian on 03.17.06 7:21 pm
see im irish and i do that all the time when ever i get the chance i stick my fingers somewhere not the butt!
Posted by Kevin on 04.23.06 12:06 am
Yeah Haashley, I’m Irish (from Ireland) and that was a fecking good joke. You’re offended far too easily. And learn how to spell you nacker.
Posted by mike on 08.30.06 7:35 pm
haashley is a sensitive cunt
Posted by bill paterson on 09.02.06 11:52 pm
god that was the worst joke ever
Posted by goodgrief on 11.30.06 8:52 am
You people really need to get a grip on this whole “racist” issue. The title of the category was “Irish jokes”. If you’re going to be offended by a joke about the/an Irish maybe you shouldn’t open up that category. Just a small thought… and yes if you are going to be insulting working on the spelling otherwise you just make yourself look unintelligent.
Posted by brittany on 07.01.07 11:41 am
haha i thought this joke was extremely funny, a bit inappropriate, but still very funny, and i agree with goodgrief, if you are going to get offended by irish jokes, then perhaps you shouldnt be in the IRISH JOKE section…